Deep

I watched American History X again tonight which always gets me thinking about racism. Not so much racism, I suppose, as where I stand in that whole spectrum. I like to think I'm enlightened, that I hold no prejudices, that all men are to be judged on their actions and character alone; but I know that's not true. I'm wary of all of the thugs on the street at night, but just a little bit more wary of those wearing puffy jackets. I worry about that. And when, as in the movie, someone talks about how innately unfair it is to give someone a position over a more qualified applicant simply because of their race - I think, yeah, why is that? Why isn't it "best man for the job"?

But then I'm also reminded that I don't really know. The only experience I can come close to having is to have a very few native american friends who have tried to explain just exactly what the situation is like, can be like. But I can't comprehend that, I try and it just doesn't stick. And the guy I work with originally from Zambia. Within the first month here after college he had is car defaced twice in ballard... in ballard. Home of snobby rich generally white people, yeah, but freaking ballard. Who the hell does that sort of stuff to someone just because they live there.

Maybe it isn't supposed to be clear cut. Maybe it's good to at least know that I have these little preconceptions so that I can be aware of them and at least try and change them. It's a lot to think about on a saturday night.

This is one of those times when this little journal is more for me to write things out and think on paper; and less for the amusement of others.